The Damned Innocents

I once heard abuse compared to a machine you couldn't get to stop long enough to safely exit.

Trigger warning: The poem featured in this month's blog is from the perspective of a person in an abusive situation. It's dedicated to all those who have ever faced the dilemma of how to deal with it.

You might think the obvious answer is "get out, any way you can", but for those of us who have been there, we know first hand that this so called "obvious" answer is not as simple as it seems. And the options we have may offer little to know assistance in keeping us, or those we love who are also threatened, safe.

If you choose to read it, please do so with an open heart, and compassion. You cannot know the "right thing" for someone to do, unless YOU are the one walking along that very path yourself. And then the answer you might come up with, will still only apply to your situation.

And if you are in an abusive situation, I see you, I hear you, I love you, and you matter. Please believe that you are worth fighting for and give yourself permission to get out - any way you can.

The Damned Innocents by Tink

​I find it funny sometimes
To hear people say
What I should have 
What they would have
What I totally could have done

And yet when I finally
Got the courage to do
What I should have
What they would have 
What I could have …so I did

They screamed liar
Impossible 
Perhaps you were wrong
That people so nice
Could have made such scars

And I stood there listened
As they took what I said
And tore it apart 
Feet to head
Leaving me bleeding in new ways instead

If it were true they yelled 
with the most scornful stares
You would’ve spoken up and left
Unless you deserved it
Yes that’s it…

They wonder why
So many of us stay
Why it takes so very long
To break away 
From those who cause such pain

But I ask you my friend
Where should we go
And when should we leave
And how to get free
Of an abuser AND society’s tyranny

Cause we’re damned if we do
And we’re damned if we don’t
And we’re wrong if we stay
But we’re wrong if we go
So we bleed some more

And when it’s all done
You remember us fondly
With love in your hearts
She should have spoken up or left
The now dearly departed

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