Flight to Freedom

It's July 4th, and I have been trying to prep this week's blog post. Four different ideas, and while all will be great for future material, none seem right for our nation's holiday.

Ironically, as we are about to celebrate Independence Day, we live in a time when our freedoms are suddenly disappearing left and right.

Roe vs Wade has been overturned. Affirmative action is in jeopardy. Businesses can now discriminate against their customers. It seems like every day, something is happening which strips us of our right to call this country a democracy.

I love my country. I recognize that I still have freedoms here that don't exist in other areas of the world. And yet I still feel we can do better, be better. Which means I have to use my voice to speak up on behalf of myself, and others.

So today, in a reminder that I am responsible for fighting for my own freedom too, I decided to publish a poem I wrote in October of 2021 after finally getting out of an abusive situation. ​Originally titled "Fool's Gold", I renamed it when I realized the heart of the poem was fighting for one's personal freedom.

Whether it be untangling yourself from the trappings of a life you don't want, extraction from a horrible situation, freeing yourself from the clutches of what society claims you "must have" to live a worthy life, or surviving a time when personal freedoms are no longer a given, this poem is really about the perseverance of the human spirit.

When you need to summon your courage my loves, I hope you find the strength to fly.

Sharing this poem is my gift to you.
Happy Independence Day. ​

xoxo
Tink

​When you smiled at me
I felt the light curl up under my toes 
And make gravity a little less
As though I could float away
Drunk on the power of a single glance

And like any addict
Needing her fix
I spent the best part of me
On anything, on everything 
That might
Maybe
Possibly
Cause one more curl of the lips in an upward movement
And your gaze to soften
Like it did the first time you looked at me

But alas
That initial smile was like a loss liter sale
Promising diamonds
And delivering fools gold

And I
Too blinded by the glitz and glitter
The likes of which I had never experienced before
Bought the whole package
At a cost of more than I could afford to spare

Frantically I searched for the exit
But at every turn you blocked my efforts
With a half smile
A partial compliment
“Love is here” you taunted me
“But if you leave too early
You’ll never find it”

Now a good salesman knows how 
To keep the client on the ropes
Dizzy with anticipation 
Pining after that which is promised

No clocks, so they don’t know how long they’ve spent
Browsing and hoping that the next find is the real deal

Pumping the music a little higher
And the heart will beat fast ..in fear? Love?
Are they the same?

Distracted I missed the fine print
The one that said
“If you stay, the rollercoaster will never end.
If you leave, you forfeit all you have”

However even the best of salesmen 
Can’t keep the pitch fresh forever

One day you slipped 
And all that glittered 
Shattered into the cheap glass it was…

I woke up to find myself locked 
Not in a store, but a prison
A mirage of illusions barring every escape route
But one
Up

So I climbed
Faster and frantically
Practically feeling your hands clawing at my feet
As you screamed
“It’s not closing time yet.
You’ll leave when I say the deal is done.”

Now half running
Half crawling
I pushed myself up 
Flight after flight of stairs 
To the one doorway you forgot to block
The roof

Busting into daylight 
I suddenly found myself at the edge

I looked back to find
You
Calmly
Walking towards me
That first smile on your face
A thousand promises on your lips
And your hand outstretched

“It’s here” you whispered
Snake oil oozed off every step
“You know what’s here…but out there, nothing is sure”

You stepped closer
Hand outstretched
I stepped backwards teetering on the edge

“It will be different this time…”
But the words you spoke were empty 
They breathed stale in the brightness of an open sky

“I don’t want to see you fall”

I turned my head 
Gazed at what I now knew to be the first rays of a sun 
Shining hopefully on the still sleeping city.
“You won’t,” I whispered.
“I intend to fly”

And then…I jumped…

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